What do You Mean I Have FSAD?

What do You Mean I Have FSAD?

This from an email I received recently from a friend. She had been married for quite some time, before her husband died some years ago. Since then, she hadn’t been dating much…but decided she didn’t want to be alone any longer.

She was now seeing a nice man, one with whom she really felt a connection.

Except in bed. That wasn’t so good. And, her confidence was slipping fast.

As we talked over coffee, later that week, the whole story came out.

Her only sexual experience had been with her late husband. It was pretty good, no major swinging from the ceiling fireworks, but warm, loving, and satisfying. It was good enough most of the time, a real bust some of the time, and over the top some of the time. (You know…like it is for most folks.)

Her new partner had decided she had FSAD…and was encouraging her to see a new doctor he’d heard about. This doctor had some special new meds he was using with women like her. “They would fix her, really quick. She’d love it,” he told her.

She wasn’t so sure…truth be told, she confided, he wasn’t all that good a lover. He was very quick to go from start to finish, seldom touched her at all, but was insistent that she touch him in very specific ways. After he came, he rolled over and went to sleep.

The big question she wanted answered was: “Do I really have FSAD?

“No Way,” I replied, “you have some combination of LLS and SLS. Hard to say how much of each.”

With a look of horror on her face, she blurted out, “Can it be fixed? What is it?”

“Two common syndromes…lots of couples have them…both men and women: Lazy Lover Syndrome and Selfish Lover Syndrome.

“Real common causes of FSAD.

“For some reason, women just don’t seem to like being neglected and uncared for, while being expected to perform.

“Funny thing that. They don’t feel like having sex.”

“I’ll send him to your website,” she replied. “He could use some current educating.”